I had a great day yesterday. Nothing in particular happened, but everything fell into place and it was a good day. I have run everyday this week except yesterday because I had to work yesterday. I had a couple come in at 10 minutes til closing and ended up selling a car at 10:30 last night. Being that yesterday was the last day of the pay period I didn't mind being there a little late to make the sale. nice way to end the pay period. Today is the first day of the new pay period - obviously - so I need to get to work! This week I dedicated my extra time to running so next week I will dedicate my extra time to working.
I talked briefly about going to see my parents a few days ago. Unfortunately, I don't go to see them that often even though they don't live far from me. Reciprocally, they don't make it to my neck of the woods on a regular basis either. Therefore, you can imagine me being overwhelmed by the fact that my dad has been staying at my house all this week and my mom is coming in this weekend to spend the weekend. I love my parents. I really do. And we get along great. But, I always feel the need to entertain them or make sure they have food and everything they need while they are with me and sometimes that is overwhelming. I have a pretty busy schedule for the most part so that can put a damper on me making sure they are content.
Oh, and there have been an awkward moment or two. For about 2 or 3 years now I have been contemplating having breast augmentation surgery and have finally scheduled a consultation for it next week. I am still debating on whether or not to go through with the surgery, because elective surgery is kind of scary to me. In order to help me make the final decision to go through with it or finally abandon this notion, I scheduled the consultation so I will really know my options. I am so freaking excited!! And scared. I am definitely a little apprehensive.
My parents are fairly religious. I grew up attending church 90% of the time the doors were opened. My mother still goes to church regularly. Even though she is not the recruiting type, she is still pretty tight with God. Which is a great thing, don't get me wrong. But, they believe that we should not desecrate our bodies. Our bodies are a part of God's temple. My sister got a tattoo when she was 23 or 24 years old and my parents still talk about what a mistake she made. (even though she was obviously an adult at the time.) Needless to say, part of my reservation on getting the surgery is having to hear their opinions about it because I know they will be negative.
Dad and I were watching an episode of CSI and the episode was about someone killing a plastic surgeon. That evidently opened the door for Dad to go into a tangent about plastic surgery and how we should be proud of the body that God gave us and how no one has realistic expectations of the results (that part I do agree with). I just nodded and kept watching without really giving a response. I don't know if that was the correct thing to do or not. That should have been my invitation to mention that I am thinking about the surgery but I am a wuss and just could not do it! I know that this is my decision and my body, etc but I am not a fan of being the cause of my parent's disappointment!
*Sigh* Life is hard! no, seriously, I know that this is not a life or death problem. I would like some opinions as to whether or not I should let this concern play a part in my decision. Maybe I should just have it done and if they notice then acknowledge it. HA HA That would be very childish, wouldn't it? Or would that be the normal thing to do? I don't generally discuss things like that with Mom and Dad anyway. I have wanted this for so long. It is possible that I will go to the consultation and chicken out all together and this won't be a discussion. But, maybe not.
So the debate continues....
Showing posts with label Mom and Dad. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mom and Dad. Show all posts
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Friday, April 3, 2009
Grim Subject Matter
I am going to my mom and dad's house this weekend. They live in the boonies in Mississippi. It has been a long while since I have been down there. My mom's whole side of the family lives down there so maybe I will get to see some cousins and aunts and uncles that I have not seen in a while.
One thing I do want to do while I am there is go to the cemetery and visit my Nanny (Grandma). Maybe it is the prospect of going to this town where I spent my summers with her. Maybe it is because I have food nostalgia. I really don't know what it is but I have missed her the past few days. I wish I would have spent more time with her. I am sure most of us say that about the loved ones that have passed on to greater things. I haven't been to the cemetery since her funeral and I have never visited someone at a cemetery so I am a little anxious about it. Do you take a gift? Am I required to talk out loud like they do on the movies? HA HA OK I know the answers to both of those questions. Still, I am sure I will feel a little weird standing out there talking to Nanny, but it is a must do.
Something else I am looking forward to is running out there. My mom and dad literally live in the middle of nowhere. They are within a few miles of a larger city and there are paved roads, but there aren't any other houses. It is all farm land. (I know when you think of the boonies in MS you think of the movie Deliverance but it isn't that bad! Besides that's Alabama!) So, there might be a man on a tractor or a stray dog or two, but it should be peaceful, unlimited running.
I have a lot to look forward to this weekend. I hope everyone else has a good weekend!
One thing I do want to do while I am there is go to the cemetery and visit my Nanny (Grandma). Maybe it is the prospect of going to this town where I spent my summers with her. Maybe it is because I have food nostalgia. I really don't know what it is but I have missed her the past few days. I wish I would have spent more time with her. I am sure most of us say that about the loved ones that have passed on to greater things. I haven't been to the cemetery since her funeral and I have never visited someone at a cemetery so I am a little anxious about it. Do you take a gift? Am I required to talk out loud like they do on the movies? HA HA OK I know the answers to both of those questions. Still, I am sure I will feel a little weird standing out there talking to Nanny, but it is a must do.
Something else I am looking forward to is running out there. My mom and dad literally live in the middle of nowhere. They are within a few miles of a larger city and there are paved roads, but there aren't any other houses. It is all farm land. (I know when you think of the boonies in MS you think of the movie Deliverance but it isn't that bad! Besides that's Alabama!) So, there might be a man on a tractor or a stray dog or two, but it should be peaceful, unlimited running.
I have a lot to look forward to this weekend. I hope everyone else has a good weekend!
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Motivation and Money
I am at a motivational crossroads. With work, with running and exercise, with cleaning the house, with taking my weekly pictures, with my blogs, with everything. Some days I am fully loaded and ready to go and others I just want to crawl in bed and pull the covers over my head. (I have taken to getting a nap in on my lunch breaks!! What the hell is wrong with me?!). I have a friend who berates himself all the time and it is awkward and gets old quickly so I don't want to go on and on. In my experience if I put it here, I am usually able to do something about it and move on. Speaking of moving on...
My Dad is my biggest hero of all time. A couple of years ago he was diagnosed with hepatitis and had to take six months worth of weekly shots that could have led him to remission. Millions of people find themselves in this situation; the shots work for some and for some they don't. For my Dad, the shots did not work. He had the option to go through another round of shot treatment, but because of how ill the shots made him, he opted to live as long as his liver will allow without the shots.
Let me back up a little. Daddy drove a truck for years and years until my sister and I came along and then he went into construction so that he could be home with my mom and us. Construction is the only thing I have really known him to do, although I grew up with stories of his truck driving days. When Daddy was taking the shots, construction was too physical to keep up with (I bet age had a part in it too. He is getting old!). Really, it made him so ill that any type of job was too much. He struggled through and worked most of the time even though he was dragging and in pain.
Anyhoo - I am telling this story for a reason... When he got over the shots, he decided to go back to driving a truck because it is not as physically demanding. I thought it was a great idea and he was excited. I co-signed for a loan for him to go back through the school and get his commercial license. He graduated and got a job right out of school with a company and went to driving. A few months later, we all find ourselves in the mess we are in now and he is laid off. There is still a few payments left on the loan so I picked up the payments. I did it for two reasons. One, to protect my credit rating and two, so that he did not have to worry about the expense until he found another job.
Fast forward a couple of months to the present. Daddy finds out that I have been paying the loan and we get into a 'discussion' about him paying me back. I explain that I don't need him to pay me back, but if he wants to then he can when he gets another job. Until that happens I am in no hurry to get the money back. The way I see it, if we are both making payments then the loan will be paid off early and we will save that much more on interest. Truth be told, I would like to pay off the loan entirely, as I see this as the same as making payments on a car we have already sold. I would never bring up paying the loan off though.
My Mom and Dad have always been the best parents that I know. Of course, I am biased! But, they always put me and my sister first and have done everything they could for us. I realize that that is part of the job description as a parent, but they did a hell of a job. I know a lot of parents who may say they agree, but their actions don't really support the theory of living for their kids like Mom and Dad do. I admit that on my list of reasons to not have kids, one of those reasons is because I don't feel that I can live up to the excellent job my parents did. I saw this loan as a way I could be there for him (and Mom) the way they have always done for me. Of course, this is only a fraction of what I owe them.
Was this an insult? Was it demeaning? My intent was not to make anyone feel bad or embarrassed, I was just trying to help. My parents are the type that won't even let us pay for dinner if we all go out. Or if I drive the 200 miles to see them, they want to give me gas money. I dropped the discussion and Dad will continue to pay the loan and if a month comes by when he needs me to pay it, then he will let me know. I am fine with that. Like I said, I wanted to help, not make them unhappy, therefore, however he wants to do it is fine with me. As long as he is content.
What is the best way to handle truly humble people? I want to show gratitude and they want to argue back and forth about them being my parents no matter how old I get (Don't get me wrong, I fully know that they will be my parents, even if I live to be 245!) My actions are a product of how they raised me - to put others first!!! For now, I will lay off of this.
My Dad is my biggest hero of all time. A couple of years ago he was diagnosed with hepatitis and had to take six months worth of weekly shots that could have led him to remission. Millions of people find themselves in this situation; the shots work for some and for some they don't. For my Dad, the shots did not work. He had the option to go through another round of shot treatment, but because of how ill the shots made him, he opted to live as long as his liver will allow without the shots.
Let me back up a little. Daddy drove a truck for years and years until my sister and I came along and then he went into construction so that he could be home with my mom and us. Construction is the only thing I have really known him to do, although I grew up with stories of his truck driving days. When Daddy was taking the shots, construction was too physical to keep up with (I bet age had a part in it too. He is getting old!). Really, it made him so ill that any type of job was too much. He struggled through and worked most of the time even though he was dragging and in pain.
Anyhoo - I am telling this story for a reason... When he got over the shots, he decided to go back to driving a truck because it is not as physically demanding. I thought it was a great idea and he was excited. I co-signed for a loan for him to go back through the school and get his commercial license. He graduated and got a job right out of school with a company and went to driving. A few months later, we all find ourselves in the mess we are in now and he is laid off. There is still a few payments left on the loan so I picked up the payments. I did it for two reasons. One, to protect my credit rating and two, so that he did not have to worry about the expense until he found another job.
Fast forward a couple of months to the present. Daddy finds out that I have been paying the loan and we get into a 'discussion' about him paying me back. I explain that I don't need him to pay me back, but if he wants to then he can when he gets another job. Until that happens I am in no hurry to get the money back. The way I see it, if we are both making payments then the loan will be paid off early and we will save that much more on interest. Truth be told, I would like to pay off the loan entirely, as I see this as the same as making payments on a car we have already sold. I would never bring up paying the loan off though.
My Mom and Dad have always been the best parents that I know. Of course, I am biased! But, they always put me and my sister first and have done everything they could for us. I realize that that is part of the job description as a parent, but they did a hell of a job. I know a lot of parents who may say they agree, but their actions don't really support the theory of living for their kids like Mom and Dad do. I admit that on my list of reasons to not have kids, one of those reasons is because I don't feel that I can live up to the excellent job my parents did. I saw this loan as a way I could be there for him (and Mom) the way they have always done for me. Of course, this is only a fraction of what I owe them.
Was this an insult? Was it demeaning? My intent was not to make anyone feel bad or embarrassed, I was just trying to help. My parents are the type that won't even let us pay for dinner if we all go out. Or if I drive the 200 miles to see them, they want to give me gas money. I dropped the discussion and Dad will continue to pay the loan and if a month comes by when he needs me to pay it, then he will let me know. I am fine with that. Like I said, I wanted to help, not make them unhappy, therefore, however he wants to do it is fine with me. As long as he is content.
What is the best way to handle truly humble people? I want to show gratitude and they want to argue back and forth about them being my parents no matter how old I get (Don't get me wrong, I fully know that they will be my parents, even if I live to be 245!) My actions are a product of how they raised me - to put others first!!! For now, I will lay off of this.
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